Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
