He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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