Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
