at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I want to be your penis for a week.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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