i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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