just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
