Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
