Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
