he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
