he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
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