i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
