Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
