Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
