So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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