ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
