Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I touched a dick in church today
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize