I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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