wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
