we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
