And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
