I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
