I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
