you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
