Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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