Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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