I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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