please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
