i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
