Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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