ya dads aren't the best wingmen
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize