i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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