I got her a Nickelback box set.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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