before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
