how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
