Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
This girl is more easily done than said...
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Randomize
