bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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