I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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