its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
