everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
