we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
