I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize