That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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