You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
