What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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