Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Randomize
