Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
where are you?
Hypothermia
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
