If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
