they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
