Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
that's an acceptable place to lick
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
