yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Randomize
