Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
